Sarah Palin: Will She 'Win' Just By Showing Up?

By Si Dunn

Republican operatives, deathly worried about Sarah Palin's absence of knowledge and experience in any areas vice presidential, are desperately trying to cram some complete talking points into her head, while also working feverishly to lower the bar for her "debate" against Democratic rival Joe Biden, Oct. 2.

According to some sources, the performance bar is now "on the ground" or "maybe even a couple of inches beneath the surface."

Her handlers will hail her as "The Winner!" immediately after she shows up and opens her mouth, and they will keep drumbeating that message no matter what she actually says in the debate.

The idea, of course, is to ensure hardcore conservative Republican voters continue listening to the drums and not to what their candidate actually is saying--or not managing to say in a coherent fashion.

However, if she does stumble through something about divine intervention and overturning Roe v. Wade as peachy-keen ideas for resurrecting America's economy, watch for Republican operatives to immediately release an edited quote beneath the following banner headline: "Sarah Palin Shows She's the New Spirit of St. Louis!"

Joe Biden will be the actual winner in the debate, of course. But he still won't get much respect, or attention, from his performance. All eyes will remain on Sarah Palin, waiting for something to happen to her hair, her glasses or her lipstick as she recounts how Vladimir Putin gave her important foreign policy experience just by flying over Alaska at 38,000 feet.

For the battered Republicans, their message no longer will have much resonance amid the economic wreckage they will leave the next President. So their new mantra will have to be: "All hail the (former Alaska beauty queen) messenger!"
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Obama-Clinton: Make It So

By Si Dunn

After the results in the South Dakota and Montana primaries are known, Hillary Clinton is expected to acknowledge that Barack Obama has gathered the necessary delegates to secure the nomination, and she will end her run for the presidency.

The best strategy now for uniting the Democratic Party and defeating John McCain will be for Sen. Obama to ensure that Sen. Clinton becomes his running mate. This will help minimize race and gender in the equations for future presidential campaigns. And it will unite two powerful and inspiring voices for renewed action and change in our tired and troubled land.

Obama-Clinton. Make it so!

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Memo to Obama, Clinton and McCain: Shut Up About Each Other, Already

By Si Dunn

All's fair in love and war--and politics.

That, of course, is just the polite way of saying nothing is fair in love and war and politics--particularly politics.

So now, in a suppposedly tight race for the White House, we are stuck once again in a short lull between "key" Democratic primaries.

Meanwhile, the candidates and their campaign staffs are busily finding any direct and obtuse way they can to try to discredit their opponents' potential abilities to be commander in chief or national healer or shining beacon of peace and hope to the troubled world.

Oh, please, Senators Obama, Clinton and McCain. Just shut up about each other now, please, and get on with explaining yourselves.

Convince us why you (without any further mention or slam of your opponents) should be the next President of the United States. Tell us what you (without any further mention or slam of your opponents) propose to do about the national economy, the housing crisis, the war in Iraq, and America's shattered world prestige, to name just a few of today's troubling issues.

Put away the race cards, the White House cards, the combat cards, the patriot cards, the religion cards, the ringing-telephone cards, the retired-generals card, the endorsement cards, etc., etc., ad naseum.

Skip the overseas "fact-finding" photo ops and the strident demands for apologies, retractions and resignations from each other's campaigns.

Rise above this petty crap. Step out of your political Green Zones--and Twilight Zones.

Between now and the November general election, just show us and tell us who the hell you really are and what you propose to try to do about the many incredible messes the current Administration will leave behind in January, 2009.

That's what we voters want and need to know. Who are you, what needs to be done, and how you think the massive mountain range of problems should be approached.

Most of what else you are doing and saying right now amounts to absurd, empty posturing and a babble of irritating noises that we voters can, and will, shut off very soon.

So shut up about each other already. Tell us something that we actually can use to help us decide.

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